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Amphitryon, or Jupiter in Disguise (1033-1034_sp26)

urn:cts:latinLit:phi0119.phi001.perseus-eng2:1033-1034_sp26
Refs {'start': {'reference': '1033', 'human_reference': 'Line 1033'}, 'end': {'reference': '1034_sp26', 'human_reference': 'Line 1034_sp26'}}
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Slave! for your own torture do you give vent to these expressions this day.
MERCURY
Now I’m performing a sacrifice to you.
AMPHITRYON
How?
MERCURY
Why, because I devote you to ill-luck[*] with this libation.
(Throws water on him.)⋯
AMPHITRYON
What, you, devote me[*], you villain? If the Gods have not this day taken away my usual form, I’ll take care that you shall be laden with bull’s hide thongs, you victim of Saturn[*]. So surely will I devote you to the cross and to torture. Come out of doors, you whip-knave.
MERCURY
You shadowy ghost—you, frighten me with your threats? If you don’t betake yourself off from here this instant, if you knock once more, if the door makes a noise with your little finger even, I’ll break your head with this tile, so that with your teeth you may sputter out your tongue.
AMPHITRYON
What, rascal, would you be for driving me away from my own house? What, would you hinder me from knocking at my own door? I’ll this instant tear it from off all its hinges.
MERCURY
Do you persist?
AMPHITRYON
I do persist.
MERCURY
Take that, then.
(Throws a tile at him.)
AMPHITRYON
Scoundrel! at your master? If I lay hands upon you this day, I’ll bring you to that pitch of misery, that you shall be miserable for evermore.
MERCURY
Surely, you must have been playing the Bacchanal[*], old gentleman.
AMPHITRYON
Why so?
MERCURY
Inasmuch as you take me to be your slave.
AMPHITRYON
What? I—take you?
MERCURY
Plague upon you! I know no master but Amphitryon.
AMPHITRYON
(to himself.)
Have I lost my form? It’s strange that Sosia shouldn’t know me. I’ll make trial. (Calling out.) How now! Tell me who I appear to be? Am I not really Amphitryon?
MERCURY
Amphitryon? Are you in your senses? Has it not been told you before, old fellow, that you have been playing the Bacchanal, to be asking another person who you are? Get away, I recommend you, don’t be troublesome while Amphitryon, who has just come back from the enemy, is indulging himself with the company of his wife.
AMPHITRYON
What wife?
MERCURY
Alcmena.
AMPHITRYON
What man?
MERCURY
How often do you want it told? Amphitryon, my master;—don’t be troublesome.
AMPHITRYON
Who’s he sleeping with?
MERCURY
Take care that you don’t meet with some mishap in trifling with me this way.
AMPHITRYON
Prithee, do tell me, my dear Sosia.
MERCURY
More civilly said—with Alcmena.
AMPHITRYON
In the same chamber?
MERCURY
Yes, as I fancy, he is sleeping with her side by side.
AMPHITRYON
Alas!—wretch that I am!
MERCURY
(to the AUDIENCE.)
It really is a gain which he imagines to be a misfortune. For to lend one’s wife to another is just as though you were to let out barren land to be ploughed.

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