Captivi: The Captives (901-920)

He has gone away from here, and has entrusted to me the most important concern of catering. Immortal Gods how I shall now be slicing necks off of sides; how vast a downfall will befall the gammon[*]; how vast a belabouring the bacon! How great a using-up of udders, how vast a bewailing for the brawn!

How great a bestirring for the butchers, how great a preparation for the porksellers! But if I were to enumerate the rest of the things which minister to the supply of the stomach, ‘twould be sheer delay. Now will I go off to my government, to give laws to the bacon, and, those gammons that are hanging uncondemned,[*] to give aid to them.

May Jupiter and the Deities confound you, Ergasilus, and your stomach,

and all Parasites, and every one who henceforth shall give a dinner to Parasites. Destruction and devastation and ruin have just now entered our house. I was afraid that he would be making an attack on me, as though he had been an hungry wolf. And very dreadfully, upon my faith, was I frightened at him; he made such a gnashing with his teeth. On his arrival, the whole larder, with the meat, he turned upside down.

He seized a knife, and first cut off the kernels of the neck[*] from three sides. All the pots and cups he broke, except those that held a couple of gallons[*]; of the cook he made enquiry whether the salting pans could be set on the fire to be made hot. All the cellars in the house he has broken into, and has laid the store-closet[*] open. (At the door.) Watch him, servants, if you please; I’ll go to meet the old gentleman.

I’ll tell him to get ready some provisions for his own self, if, indeed, he wishes himself to make use of any. For in this place, as this man, indeed, is managing, either there’s nothing already, or very soon there will be nothing.