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Stichus, or The Parasite Rebuffed (398-467b)

urn:cts:latinLit:phi0119.phi018.perseus-eng2:398-467b
Refs {'start': {'reference': '398', 'human_reference': 'Line 398'}, 'end': {'reference': '467b', 'human_reference': 'Line 467b'}}
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In good sooth, Gelasimus, I doubt you have come to but little purpose, if neither he that is here gives you any aid, nor yet he thats coming.
Ill off indoors to my books[*], and take my instructions from the cleverest sayings; for if I dont drive away those fellows, the Parasites that are coming, most surely Im undone.
(Exit.)
402
(Enter EPIGNOMUS and STICHUS, followed by some SLAVES.)
EPIGNOMUS
Inasmuch as, my business prosperously carried on, I am returned safe home, thanks do I return to Neptune and to his tempests; to Mercury as well[*], who in my traffic
has aided me, and by my profits has rendered my property fourfold. Those whom formerly I affected with sorrow at my departure, the same shall I now make joyous at my arrival. But already have I met my connexion Antipho, and from bad terms have I returned to friendship with him.
See, prithee, what money can effect. Since, my affairs prospering, he sees that Ive returned, and brought home great wealth, without any mediators, there on board the ship, upon the deck, we have returned to friendship and good feeling.
Both he and my brother dine with me this day; for yesterday we were both in the same harbour[*] together; but to-day my ship weighed anchor a little the soonest. Take these people in-doors, Stichus, whom[*] Ive brought with me.
STICHUS
Master, whether Im silent or speak, Im sure you know
how many hardships Ive endured in your service; now, on my arrival home, I wish to spend in freedom[*] this one day after these many hardships.
EPIGNOMUS
You ask whats just and right. Stlchus, you may take this day for yourself; I dont object to it. Go where you like.
A cask, too, of old wine, I give you to drink.
STICHUS
O, grand! Ill have my mistress this day.
EPIGNOMUS
Even ten, so long as it is at your own expense.
STICHUS
What ?
EPIGNOMUS
What ?
STICHUS
Ill go and dine
Tis thus it pleases me
EPIGNOMUS
Where do you dine to-day?
STICHUS
This plan have I thus resolved upon. I have a mistress here in the neighbourhood, Stephanium, the servantmaid of your brother. Im going to invite her; Ill take her to a pic-nic entertainment[*] at her fellow-servants, Sagarinus We both have the same mistress; we are rivals.
EPIGNOMUS
Come then, conduct them in. I grant you this day.
STICHUS
Hold me to blame if I dont make the most of it[*]. Troth now, Ill pass through the garden to my mistress, to engage her beforehand for me this evening; at the same time Ill give my contribution, and bid the dinner to be cooked at Sagarinuss,
or else Ill go myself and make my marketing as caterer. Sagarinus, a servant for my with stripes to take him home well thrashed,
Ill make all things to be in readiness here; but Im delaying myself. And dont you be surprised[*] (to the AUDIENCE) that men, who are slaves, drink, court, and give invitations to dinner? This is allowed us at Athens. But when I think of it, rather than meet with censure, theres here, too,
another door to the back buildings of our house. Ill go that way to market; by that way Ill bring back the provisionsthrough the garden theres a passage that communicates with both houses. (To the SLAVES.) Do you follow me this way. I surely will pull this day to bits[*].
(Goes into the house of EPIGNOMUS.)
454
(Enter GELASIMUS.)
GELASIMUS
(to himself.)
Ive consulted my books; Im as sure as possible,
that by my funny bon mots I shall recover my patron[*]. Now Im going to see whether he has arrived by this from the harbour, that when he comes I may smooth him down with my speeches.
EPIGNOMUS
Surely, this is Gelasimus, the Parasite, thats coming.
GELASIMUS
(to himself.)
With lucky auspices, by my troth, this day did I come out of doors;
since an omen auspiciously befel me[*]. This was beheld by me; how a weasel carried off a mouse close at my feet. For as she found sustenance for herself this day, so do I hope that I shall do, as the augury predicts.
(Sees EPIGNOMUS.) Surely this is Epignomus thats standing here; Ill go and address him. My dear Epignomus, how pleased I am to see you now; how my tears are starting forth for very joy. Have you all along enjoyed your health?
EPIGNOMUS
With care it has been preserved.

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