Bacchides, or The Twin Sisters (1-1120)

PISTOCLERUS

⋯ those who are[*] of a thrifty turn of mind, modest, and without servility. ⋯ Chains, rods, and mills; their shocking brutality becomes worse. ⋯ She who keeps my friend and me engaged. ⋯ (Exit.) Enter FIRST BACCHIS.

1st BACCHIS

I have heard

[*] that Ulysses underwent toils innumerable, who, in wanderings, was twenty years away from his native land. But this young man by far outdoes Ulysses; who here in this spot is wandering within the walls of the city. ⋯

1st BACCHIS

⋯ She was of the same name with myself. ⋯

1st BACCHIS

Sweep out the house

[*] with brooms, work briskly. ⋯ Will some one call that most dirty fellow with the water-pail [*] and the water. CLEOMACHUS, SECOND BACCHIS.

CLEOMACHUS

⋯ But if a life

[*] of wantonness is perchance preferred by you, consider the price that I agreed to give you that at that age you might not be following me for nought ⋯ that from no one else you might be receiving a yearly pay, except from oneself, nor be toying with any man ⋯ like slugs upon a man. PISTOCLERUS, SECOND BACCHIS, SERVANT. ⋯

PISTOCLERUS

As like as milk

[*] is to milk; whatever is her name ⋯

SERVANT

The soldier who sells his life for gold ⋯ I know that his breath is much stronger than when the bellows of bull's hide are blowing, when the rocks melt where the iron is made.

PISTOCLERUS

Of what country did he seem to you?

SERVANT

I think he is of Præneste

[*]; he was such a boaster.

PISTOCLERUS

⋯ The city ⋯ and I don't think it is in spurious boastfulness. ⋯ Enter FIRST and SECOND BACCHIS.

1st BACCHIS

⋯ My heart, my hope

[*], my honey, my sweetness, my nutriment, my delight. ⋯ Let me bestow on you my love ⋯ the Arabian ⋯ Has Cupid or has love overpowered you? ⋯ Perhaps to suspect that you are in love. ⋯ Get money from that quarter ⋯ for I really do believe that with ease you can enchant the heart of any man [*].

1st BACCHIS

And suppose it is much better that you should hold your peace, and I should speak?

2nd BACCHIS

With pleasure; you may proceed.

1st BACCHIS

When my memory shall fail me, then do you take care to aid me, sister.

2nd BACCHIS

I' faith, I'm more afraid that I shan't have the choice of prompting you.

1st BACCHIS

Troth, I'm afraid the little nightingale may lose her powers

[*] of song. Follow this way. They move. Enter PISTOCLERUS.

PISTOCLERUS

What are these two Courtesans, the namesake-sisters, about?

1st BACCHIS

Nothing is there more wretched than a woman.

PISTOCLERUS

What, say you, is there more worthy of it? What have you been planning in your consultation?

1st BACCHIS

What's proper?

PISTOCLERUS

I' faith, that doesn't belong to the Courtesan.

1st BACCHIS

This sister of mine entreats me so to find some person to protect her against this Captain; that when she as served her time

[*] he may bring her back home. Do you, I entreat you, be her protector.

PISTOCLERUS

Why should I protect her?

1st BACCHIS

That she may be brought home again, when she has fulfilled her engagement to him, so that he may not take her as a servant

[*] for himself. But, if she had the gold to pay him back again, gladly would she do so.

PISTOCLERUS

Where now is this person?

1st BACCHIS

I expect that he'll be here just now. But this you'll be able to arrange better among ourselves; and sitting there, you shall wait until he comes. So you will drink some wine, and so, I'll give you a kiss when you have drunk it.

PISTOCLERUS

Your coaxing is mere birdlime.

1st BACCHIS

How so?

PISTOCLERUS

Because, in fact, I understand how you two are aiming at one poor pigeon, myself; aside very nearly is the limed reed

[*] breaking my feathers. Madam, I judge that such deeds befit me not.

1st BACCHIS

Why so, I pray?

PISTOCLERUS

Bacchis, it is, because I dread you Bacchantes, and your Bacchanalian den

[*].

1st BACCHIS

What is it that you dread? Surely, not that the couch in my house may lead you into mischief?

PISTOCLERUS

Your allurements

[*], more than your couch, do I dread. You're a mischievous serpent [*]. But, madam, a lurking-place does not befit this youthful age.

1st BACCHIS

Should you wish at my house to do anything that's unwise, I myself should hinder it. But, when the Captain comes, I wish you to be at my house for this reason; because, when you are present, no one will do her and me any injury. You will prevent that, and by the same means you will be aiding your friend; this Captain, too, on arriving, will suspect that I am your mistress. Why are you silent, pray?

PISTOCLERUS

Because these things are pleasant in the talking of; but in the practice, and when you make trial, the same are armed with stings. They pierce the feelings, goad one's fortune, and wound one's merits and character.

2nd BACCHIS

What do you dread from her?

PISTOCLERUS

What do I dread, do you ask? Am I a person in my youth to enter a place of exercise

[*] of such a nature, where people sweat to their undoing?—where for the quoit I rereive a loss, disgrace, too, for my running?

2nd BACCHIS

How charmingly you do talk.

PISTOCLERUS

Where I'm to take a turtle-dove

[*] instead of a sword, and where another puts into my hand the goblet [*] instead of the cestus; the drinking-cup [*] is in place of the helmet, the wreathed garland instead of the crest [*], the dice in place of the lance. For the coat of mail I should have to assume a soft cloak [*]; where, too, in place of a horse a couch must be given me,—for shield, a strumpet [*] may be lying by me. Avaunt from me—avaunt!

2nd BACCHIS

O, you're too fierce.

PISTOCLERUS

I am attending to my own interests.

2nd BACCHIS

You must be softened down; and, in fact, I offer you my aid in this.

PISTOCLERUS

But you are too expensive an assistant.

1st BACCHIS

Do pretend that you are in love with me.

PISTOCLERUS

Whether should I be pretending that in jest, or seriously?

1st BACCHIS

Well said! better to do the last. When the Captain comes here, I want you

[*] to embrace me.

PISTOCLERUS

What need is there of my doing that?

1st BACCHIS

I want him to see you. I know what I'm about?

PISTOCLERUS

And I, i' faith, I know not what I'm in fear of. But what say you—?

1st BACCHIS

What's the matter now?

PISTOCLERUS

Well, suppose perchance on a sudden a breakfast or a drinking bout, or else a dinner, should take place at your house, just as is the wont in such places of resort; where, then, should I take my place?

1st BACCHIS

Near myself, my life, that with a she wit a he wit may be reclining at the repast. A place here, at our house, should you come late, is always at your service. When you wish right merrily to disport yourself, my rosebud, you say to me, "Do let me enjoy myself to-day," I'll provide you a delightful place where it may be so.

PISTOCLERUS

Here is a rapid stream; not without hazard can this way be passed.

1st BACCHIS

aside. And, by my troth, something must you lose amid this stream. Aloud. Give me your hand and follow me.

PISTOCLERUS

O, by no means. 1st

FIRST BACCHIS

Why so?

PISTOCLERUS

Because to a man in his youth nothing can be more alluring than these—night, women, wine.

1st BACCHIS

Away, then, with you; for my part, I don't at all care for it, but for your own sake. The Captain, then, shall take her off; don't you be present at all if you don't choose.

PISTOCLERUS

to himself. And am I a thing of nothing, who cannot moderate my own passions?

1st BACCHIS

What's there for you to fear?

PISTOCLERUS

There's nothing; all nonsense. Madam, I resign myself to you. I'm yours; to you do I devote my services.

1st BACCHIS

You are a dear man. Now I wish you to do this. To-day I want to give a welcome entertainment

[*] to my sister. For that purpose I shall at once order the money [*] to be brought you from in-doors. Do you take care and cater for us a splendid entertainment.

PISTOCLERUS

No, I'll stand treat; for it would be a shame, that on my account you both should take trouble for me, and by reason of that trouble should pay the expense from your own means.

1st BACCHIS

But I can't allow you to give anything.

PISTOCLERUS

Do let me.

1st BACCHIS

Well, I'll let you, if you choose. Prithee, do make haste.

PISTOCLERUS

I shall be here again, before I cease to love you. (Exit PISTOCLERUS.)

2nd BACCHIS

You entertain me pleasantly upon my return, my sister.

1st BACCHIS

How so, prithee?

2nd BACCHIS

Because, in my way of thinking, this day a lucky haul has fallen to your lot.

1st BACCHIS

He's mine, assuredly. Now, sister, with respect to Mnesilochus, I'll give you my aid

[*], that here at home you may be receiving gold, rather than be going hence together with the Captain.

2nd BACCHIS

That's my desire.

1st BACCHIS

My aid shall be given you. The water's warm; let's go in, that you may bathe. For, as you have travelled on board ship, you are faint, I think.

2nd BACCHIS

A little so, sister. PISTOCLERUS is seen at a distance. Besides, he's beginning to cause I don't know what bustle. Let's begone hence.

1st BACCHIS

Follow me this way in-doors to bathe, that you may relieve your weariness.

LYDUS

For some time, Pistoclerus, I've been following you in silence[*], watching what you were doing in this dress

[*]. For, so may the Gods favour me, even Lycurgus himself [*] seems to me as if he could be led into debauchery here. Whither now are you betaking yourself hence in an opposite direction with such a train?

PISTOCLERUS

To this place pointing to the house.

LYDUS

Why to this place? Who lives there?

PISTOCLERUS

Love, Pleasure, Venus, Beauty, Joy, Jesting, Dalliance, Converse, and Sweet-kissing.

LYDUS

What intercourse have you with these most destructive Deities?

PISTOCLERUS

Bad are those men who speak evil of the good. You speak not well of even the Gods themselves; you do what is not right.

LTD.

Is Sweet-kissing, then, some God?

PISTOCLERUS

And do you not think she is? O Lydus, why, what a barbarians

[*] you are, you, whom I had deemed to be far more wise than Thales hinself [*]. Go to, you are more foolish than Potitius, the foreigner [*], who, at an age so advanced, knew not the names of the Divinities.

LYDUS

This dress of yours pleases me not.

PISTOCLERUS

But no one prepared it for you; it was prepared for myself, whom it pleases well.

LYDUS

And do you commence upon your repartees against myself even? You, who, if you had even ten tongues, ought to be silent.

PISTOCLERUS

Not every age, Lydus, is suited for school

[*]. One thing especially is just now on my mind, how the cook may with due care attend to these things as befits the elegance of the entertainment.

LYDUS

Now have you undone yourself and me and all my labours, me who so oft have shown you what is right, all to no purpose.

PISTOCLERUS

In the same place have I lost my labour where you've lost yours: your instructions profit neither me nor yourself.

LYDUS

O obdurate heart!

PISTOCLERUS

You are troublesome to me. Hold your tongue, Lydus, and follow me.

LYDUS

Now, see that, please; he no longer calls

[*] me "tutor," but mere "Lydus."

PISTOCLERUS

It seems not proper, nor can it be fit, that, when a person is in a house, and is reclining at the feast together with his mistress, and is kissing her, and the other guests are reclining too, the tutor should be there too in their presence.

LYDUS

Are these provisions purchased for such a purpose, pray?

PISTOCLERUS

My intentions, indeed, expect so; how it falls out, is in the hands of the Gods.

LYDUS

Will you be having a mistress?

PISTOCLERUS

When you see, then you'll know.

LYDUS

Aye, but you shall not have one, and I won't allow it. Go back again home.

PISTOCLERUS

Do leave me alone, Lydus, and beware of mischief

[*].

LYDUS

What? Beware of mischief? O yawning gulf, where art thou now? How gladly would I avail myself of thee! Already have I lived far longer than I could have wished. 'Twere much better now to have once existed than to be living still. That any pupil should thus threaten his tutor!

PISTOCLERUS

My years are now advanced beyond your tutorship.

LYDUS

I want no pupils for me with heated blood

[*]. An up-grown one may harass me thus devoid of strength.

PISTOCLERUS

As I guess, I shall become a Hercules, and you a Linus

[*].

LYDUS

I' faith, I fear more that through your goings-on I shall become a Phœnix

[*], and have to tell the news to your father that you are dead.

PISTOCLERUS

Enough of these stories.

LYDUS

This youth is lost to shame

[*]; the man's ruined. And does it then recur to you that you have a father?

PISTOCLERUS

Am I your servant, or you mine?

LYDUS

By my troth, you made an exchange not desirable for that age of yours, when you gained these impudent ways. Some bad master has been teaching you all this, not I. You are a scholar far more apt at these pursuits than at those lessons which I taught you when I was losing my labour. Troth, 'twas a bad piece of deceit you were guilty of at your age, when you concealed these vicious tendencies from myself and from your father.

PISTOCLERUS

Lydus, you have thus far had liberty of speech; that is enough. So now do you follow this way, and hold your tongue

[*]. They go into the house of BACCHIS.

CHRYSALUS

All hail, land of my master! which I joyfully behold after the two years that I have been absent hence at Ephesus. I salute thee, neighbour Apollo

[*], who dost have thy shrine close by our house, and to thee do I make my prayer, that thou wilt not let me meet our old gentleman, Nicobulus, before I have seen Pistoclerus, the friend of Mnesilochus, him to whom Mnesilochus has sent the letter about his mistress, Bacchis.

PISTOCLERUS

to the FIRST BACCHIS within. 'Tis strange that you are so earnestly begging me to return, who am able by no possible means to depart hence, if I were willing, so bound down

[*], and so enchained with love do you hold me.

CHRYSALUS

O, ye immortal Gods, I espy Pistoclerus! O, Pistoclerus, hail!

PISTOCLERUS

Hail, Chrysalus, to you!

CHRYSALUS

I will at present compress many speeches for you in a small space. You are glad that I am come; I give you credit for it. You promise me lodging and an entertainment coming from my journey, as it is befitting, and I agree to come. I bring you the sincere greetings of your friend. Would you ask me where he is? He's come.

PISTOCLERUS

Is he alive and well?

CHRYSALUS

That I was wishful to enquire of yourself.

PISTOCLERUS

How can I know?

CHRYSALUS

No one better.

PISTOCLERUS

Why, in what way?

CHRYSALUS

Because if she has been found whom he so loves, he is alive and well. If she is not found, he is not well, and is like to die. His mistress is the very life of a lover. If she is away, he is non-existent; if she is with him, his property is non-existent, and himself worthless and wretched. But what have you done in respect of his commission?

PISTOCLERUS

And ought I not to have his request complied with against his arrival, which his messenger brought to me from him? I'd sooner be dwelling in the realms of Acheron than not.

CHRYSALUS

How now, have you found out this Bacchis?

PISTOCLERUS

Yes, and a Samian one too.

CHRYSALUS

Prithee, do take care that no one handles her carelessly: you know how soon a Samian vessel

[*] is wont to break.

PISTOCLERUS

What now, your old habit?

CHRYSALUS

Prithee, do tell me where she now is.

PISTOCLERUS

Here, where you just now saw me coming out.

CHRYSALUS

How capital that is! She's living almost next door. Does she at all remember Mnesilochus?

PISTOCLERUS

Do you ask me that? Aye, him alone does she esteem at the very highest value.

CHRYSALUS

Indeed!

PISTOCLERUS

Yes, and were you to believe her, distractedly in love—she quite longs for him.

CHRYSALUS

That's good.

PISTOCLERUS

Yes, Chrysalus; see, now; not even so small a space of time ever passes by as this

[*], out that she is uttering his name.

CHRYSALUS

I' faith, so much the better. Moving, as if about to go.

PISTOCLERUS

Yes; but—Holds him. CHRYS. Yes, faith

[*], I'd rather be off.

PISTOCLERUS

And do you so unwillingly hear how your master's interests have prospered?

CHRYSALUS

No, not the subject

[*], but the actor offends my feelings with his tediousness. Even "Epidicus," a play that I love quite as much as my own self, were Pollio to act it [*], no play would I see so reluctantly. But, does Bacchis seem handsome, as well, to you?

PISTOCLERUS

Do you ask the question? Had I not got a Venus, I should pronounce her a Juno.

CHRYSALUS

I' faith, Mnesilochus, as I find these matters proceeding, there's something ready for you to love; 'tis needful that you find something to give her. But, perhaps you have need of gold for that other one?

PISTOCLERUS

Yes, some Philippeans.

CHRYSALUS

And you have need of it directly, perhaps?

PISTOCLERUS

Aye, and even sooner than directly. For there's a Captain coming here just now—

CHRYSALUS

A Captain, indeed!

PISTOCLERUS

Who is demanding some gold here for relinquishing Bacchis.

CHRYSALUS

Let him come when he pleases, and so there be no delay. The money's at home; I fear not for myself, nor do I go begging to any man; so long, at least, as this heart of mine shall be armed with its inventiveness. Go in; I'll manage here. Do you tell them in-doors, that Mnesilochus is coming to Bacchis.

PISTOCLERUS

I'll do as you request. Goes into the house of BACCHIS.

CHRYSALUS

The money business belongs to me. From Ephesus we have brought twelve hundred golden Philippeans, which our entertainer owed to our old gentleman. Hence, some contrivance

[*] will I this day contrive, to procure gold for this son of my master thus in love. But there's a noise at our door—who's coming out of doors, I wonder? Stands aside.

NICOBULUS

to himself. To the Piræus will I go; I'll go see whether any merchant-ship has come into harbour from Ephesus. For my mind misgives me; my son lingers there so long, and does not return.

CHRYSALUS

aside. Now, I'll finely unravel him, if the Gods are propitious. There must be no sleeping; gold is requisite

[*] for Chrysalus. I'll accost him, whom for sure this day I'll make a ram of Phryxus [*] of; so, even to the quick [*], will I shear him of his gold. Accosting him. His servant Chrysalus salutes Nicobulus.

NICOBULUS

O, immortal Gods! where is my son?

CHRYSALUS

Why don't you return the salutation first, which I gave you?

NICOBULUS

Well, save you. But where on earth is Mnesilochus P

CHRYSALUS

He is alive and well. Nico. Is he not come?

CHRYSALUS

He is come. Nico. Hurra! you've brought me to[*] my senses. And has he all along been well?

CHRYSALUS

Aye, well as a boxer

[*] and an athlete.

NICOBULUS

But what as to this—the business on account or which I sent him hence to Ephesus? Has he rot received the gold from his entertainer, Archidemides?

CHRYSALUS

Alas! my heart and my brain are cleft, Nicobulus, whenever mention is made of that fellow. Why don't you call that entertainer of his your enemy?

NICOBULUS

Troth now, prithee, why so?

CHRYSALUS

Because, i' faith, I know for sure, that Vulcan, the Moon, the Sun, the Day, those four Divinities, never shone upon another more wicked.

NICOBULUS

What, than Archidemides? Dear me!

CHRYSALUS

Than Archidemides, I say.

NICOBULUS

What has he done?

CHRYSALUS

What has he not done? Why don't you ask me that? In the first place, then, he began to make denials to your son, and to assert that he didn't owe three obols

[*] to you. Forthwith, Mnesilochus summoned to himself there our ancient host, the old gentleman, Pelago; in his presence, he at once showed the fellow the token [*], which you yourself had given to your son to deliver to him.

NICOBULUS

Well—when he showed him the token?

CHRYSALUS

He began to say that it was counterfeit, and that it was not a true token; and how many reproaches he did utter against him so undeserving of them! and he said that in other matters he had committed forgery.

NICOBULUS

Have you not the gold? In the first place, I want that to be told me.

CHRYSALUS

Yes, after the Prætor had appointed delegates

[*]; being cast, at length compelled by force he paid down twelve hundred Philippeans.

NICOBULUS

He owed that much.

CHRYSALUS

Besides, listen to another struggle of his, as well, which he was desirous to enter on.

NICOBULUS

What, besides, as well? Oho! this will turn out now a regular hawk's nest

[*]. I've been deceived. I've entrusted my gold to an Autolycus [*] for my host!

CHRYSALUS

Nay, but do you listen—

NICOBULUS

Well, I wasn't aware of the disposition of my avaricious entertainer.

CHRYSALUS

Afterwards, at last we had got the gold, and embarked on board ship, desirous for home. By chance, as I was sitting on the deck, while I was looking about me, at that moment I beheld a long bark being fitted out by this cheating knave.

NICOBULUS

Troth, I'm undone; that bark breaks my heart

[*].

CHRYSALUS

This was held in partnership by your host and some pirates.

NICOBULUS

And that I should be such a blockhead as to trust him, when his very name of Archidemides

[*] cried aloud to me that he would deprive me of it, if I should entrust anything to him.

CHRYSALUS

This bark was lying in wait for our ship. I began to watch them, to see what business they were about. Meanwhile, from harbour our ship set sail. When we had fully left the harbour, these fellows began to follow with their oars; nor birds, nor winds more swiftly. As I discovered what scheme was being carried out, at once we dropped anchor. As they beheld us stopping, they began to keep their vessel back in harbour.

NICOBULUS

Wicked wretches, by my troth. What did you do at last?

CHRYSALUS

We returned again into harbour.

NICOBULUS

'Twas cleverly done by you. What after that?

CHRYSALUS

At nightfall they returned ashore.

NICOBULUS

Troth now, they intended to carry off the gold; they were attempting that plan, no doubt.

CHRYSALUS

It didn't escape me; I discovered it: I was almost terrified to death by it. As I saw that a scheme was being laid against the gold, forthwith on this we came to this determination; the next day we carried away all the gold thence in their presence, openly and publicly, that they might know it was done.

NICOBULUS

Skilfully managed, i' faith. Tell me, what did they?

CHRYSALUS

Chopfallen at once,—soon as ever they saw us leaving the harbour with the gold, shaking their heads, they hauled their bark ashore. We deposited all the gold with Theotimus, who is a priest there

[*] of Ephesian Diana.

NICOBULUS

Who is this Theotimus?

CHRYSALUS

The son of Megalobyzus

[*], who is now living at Ephesus, a man most dear to the Ephesians.

NICOBULUS

By my troth, he'll surely turn out very much more dear to me

[*] if he shall chouse me out of all that gold.

CHRYSALUS

But it is stowed away in the very temple itself of the Goddess Diana; there they keep guard at the public expense

[*].

NICOBULUS

You kill me outright; much more safely would it have been kept in private hands. But haven't you brought any of the gold home here?

CHRYSALUS

O yes; but how much he has brought, I don't know.

NICOBULUS

How's that?—not know?

CHRYSALUS

Because Mnesilochus went privately by night to Theotimus; and didn't wish to entrust it to me, nor to any one in the ship. For that reason I don't know how much he has brought, but he hasn't brought very much.

NICOBULUS

Do you think it was even a half?

CHRYSALUS

By my troth, I know not; but I don't think it.

NICOBULUS

Does he bring a third part?

CHRYSALUS

Troth, I think not; but I do not know the truth. Indeed, I know nothing at all about the gold, except that I do know nothing about it. Now, you yourself must take a voyage there on board ship, to carry home this gold from Theotimus; and, hearkye— Takes him by the arm.

NICOBULUS

What do you want?

CHRYSALUS

Take care and remember to carry your son's ring.

NICOBULUS

What need is there of the ring?

CHRYSALUS

Because that is the token agreed on with Theotimus, that the person who brings it to him, to him he is to give up the gold.

NICOBULUS

I'll remember it, and you advise me well. But is this Theotimus rich?

CHRYSALUS

What, do you ask that? Why, hasn't he the soles fastened to his shoes with gold?

NICOBULUS

Why does he thus despise it?

CHRYSALUS

He has such immense riches; he doesn't know what to do with his gold.

NICOBULUS

I wish he'd give it me. But in whose presence was this gold delivered to Theotimus?

CHRYSALUS

In presence of the people; there's not a person in Ephesus but what knows it.

NICOBULUS

My son at least did wisely there, in entrusting that gold to a rich man to keep. From him it may be recovered even at a moment's notice.

CHRYSALUS

Aye, and look here, he'll never keep you waiting even thus much shows his finger-nail from receiving it on the very day you arrive there.

NICOBULUS

I thought that I had escaped a seafaring life, and that, at length, an old man of my years, I shouldn't be sailing about. But now I find that I'm not allowed to have the choice whether I would or no; 'tis my fine host Archidemides has done me this. Where, then, is my son, Mnesilochus, at present?

CHRYSALUS

He has gone to the market-place to pay his respects to the Deities and his friends.

NICOBULUS

Then I'll go hence to meet him as soon as I can. (Exit NICOBULUS.)

CHRYSALUS

He's right well loaded, and carries more than his proper burden. Not so very badly has this web been commenced by me, that I may find means for the son of my master in his amour. I've managed it so, that he may take as much of the gold as he chooses, and give up to his father as much as he may like to give up. The old gentleman will be going hence to Ephesus to fetch his gold; here our life will be spent in a delicious manner, since the old man will leave me and Mnesilochus here, and not be taking us along with him. O! what a kick-up I shall be making here. But what's to be done, when the old gentleman shall have discovered this? When he shall have found out that he has made his journey thither to no purpose, and that we have misspent his gold, what will become of me after that? I' faith, I think upon his arrival he'll be changing my name, and at once be making me Crucisalus

[*] instead of Chrysalus. Troth, I'll run away, if there shall be a greater necessity for it. If I'm caught, I'll plague him for a punishment [*]; if his rods are in the fields, still my back's at home. Now I'll be off, and tell my master's son this contrivance about the gold, and about his mistress Bacchis who has been found. (Exit.)

LYDUS

Open and throw back straightway this gate of hell

[*], I do entreat. For, really, I do deem it nothing else; inasmuch as no one comes here but he whon all hopes have deserted, that he may yet be a decent person. Bacchis—no, not Bacchis is their name, but they are most determined Bacchanals. Avaunt from me, you sisters, who suck the blood of men. Richly and elegantly furnished is this house—for destruction. Soon as I beheld all this, at once I straight-way way betook myself to my heels. And ought I to carry these things concealed in secrecy? Ought I, Pistoclerus, to conceal from your father your excesses, or your misdeeds, or your places of resort? by which you are aiming to drive your father and myself, and your own self and all your friends, to disgrace, and shame, and ruin altogether, and to destroy us all. Within yourself you entertain no awe of either me or your own self on account of the deeds which you are doing by which you have made your own father and myself as well, your friends and your connexions, to be abettors [*] in the disgrace of your excesses. Now, before you add this mischief to the rest, I am resolved at once to tell your parent. This instant from myself will I remove this blame, and shall disclose the matter to the old gentleman, that he may forthwith draw forth his son out from this loathsome pollution. (Exit.)

MNESILOCHUS

In many ways have I thought it over with myself, and thus I think it is; a man your friend, who is a friend such as the name imports—except the Gods—nothing does excel him. By fact have I experienced it so to be. For when I departed hence to Ephesus ('tis now almost two years ago it happened), from Ephesus I sent letters hither to my friend Pistoclerus, requesting that he would find out my mistress Bacchis for me. I hear that he has found her, as my servant Chrysalus has brought me word. How aptly, too, has he framed a device against my father about the gold, that I may have abundance in my amour. I see 'tis right

[*] that I should make a due return. 'Tis better for you to be styled extravagant than ungrateful; but, i' faith, in my way of thinking at least, there's nothing more extravagant than the ungrateful man. The former the good will praise, the latter even the bad will censure. 'Twere better for an ill-doer to escape than for a benefactor to be deserted. For this reason, then, it behoves me to take the greater care; I needs must be on the watch. Now, Mnesilochus, the sample is on view, now the contest is being decided, whether you are or are not such as you ought to be; good or bad, of whichever kind; just or unjust, penurious or liberal, fretful or complying. Take you care, if you please, lest you let your servant exce. you in doing well. Whatever you shall prove, I warn you, you shall not be concealed. But see, I perceive my friend's father and his tutor coming this way. I'll listen what matter 'tis they are upon. He retires aside.

LYDUS

I'll now make trial, whether your heart is sharpened by wisdom in your breast. Follow me.

PHILOXENUS

Whither shall I follow? Whither are you now leading me?

LYDUS

To her who has undone, utterly destroyed your single, only son.

PHILOXENUS

How now, Lydus; those are the wiser who mode-rate their passion. 'Tis less to be

[*] wondered at if this age does some of these things than if it does not do so; I, as well, did the same in my youth.

LYDUS

Ah me! ah me! this over-indulgence has proved his ruin. For had he been without you, I should have had him trained up to moral rectitude; now, by reason of you and your trusting disposition, Pistoclerus has become abandoned.

MNESILOCHUS

aside. Immortal Gods! he names my friend. What means this, that Lydus is thus exciting his master, Pistoclerus?

PHILOXENUS

'Tis but a little time, Lydus, that a man has a desire to indulge his inclinations; the time will soon come, when he will hate himself even. Humour him; so that care is taken that he offends not beyond the line of honor, e'en suffer him.

LYDUS

I'll suffer him not, nor, for my part, while I'm alive, will I allow him to be corrupted. But you, who are pleading his cause for a son so profligate, was this same your own training, when you were a young man? I declare that for your first twenty years you had not even this much liberty, to move your foot out of the house even a finger's length away from your tutor. When it did happen so, this evil, too, was added to the evil; both pupil and preceptor were esteemed disgraced. Before the rising of the sun had you not come to the school for exercise

[*], no slight punishment would you have had at the hands of the master of the school. There did they exercise themselves rather with running, wrestling, the quoit, the javelin, boxing, the ball, and leaping, rather than with harlots or with kissing; there did they prolong their lives [*], and not in secret-lurking holes. Then, when from the hippodrome [*] and school of exercise you had returned home, clad in your belted frock [*], upon a stool by your masters [*] would you sit; and there, when you were reading your book, if you made a mistake in a single syllable, your skin would be made as spotted as your nurse's gown [*].

MNESILOCHUS

(aside). I'm sorely vexed, to my sorrow, that on my account these things should be said about my friend. In his innocence he incurs this suspicion for my sake.

PHILOXENUS

The manners, Lydus, now are altered.

LYDUS

That, for my part, I know full well. For formerly, a man used to receive public honors by the votes of the people, before he ceased to be obedient to one appointed his tutor. But now-a-days, before he is seven years old, if you touch a boy with your hand, at once the child breaks his tutor's head with his tablet. When you go to complain to the father, thus says the father to the child: "Be you my own dear boy, since you can defend yourself from an injury." The tutor then is called for; "Hallo! you old good-for-nothing

[*], don't you be touching the child for this reason, that he has behaved so boldly;" and thus the despised tutor becomes just like a lantern [*] with his oiled linen rags. Judgment pronounced, they go away thence. Can this preceptor then, on these terms, keep up his authority, if he himself is to be beaten the first?