Dialogues of the Gods (2.3-2.4)

But I won’t disgrace you, father. I’m a musician and play the pipe loud and true. Dionysus is lost without me, and has made me his companion and fellow-reveller; I’m his dance-leader, and if you could see how many flocks I have around Tegea and on Parthenium, you’d be delighted. I’m lord and master of all Arcadia. Besides that, the other day, I fought so magnificently on the side of the Athenians at Marathon that a prize of valour was chosen for me—the cave under the Acropolis. [*] Anyhow, go to Athens and you’ll soon find out what a great name Pan has there.

Tell me, are you married yet, Pan? Pan’s the name they give you, isn’t it?

Of course not, daddy. I’m romantically inclined, and wouldn’t like to have to confine my attentions to just one.

No doubt, then, you try your luck with the nanny-goats?

A fine jest coming from you! My lady-friends are Echo and Pitys and all the Maenads of Dionysus, and I’m in great demand with them.

Please do me a favour, son. I’ve never asked one from you before.

Tell me what you want, daddy, and let me see to it.

You may come here and pay your respects to me, but please don’t call me daddy when anyone can hear.