The Parasite: a Demonstration that Sponging is a Profession (6-10)

The next point to be established is, that sponging depends not merely on perceptions, but on perceptions regularly employed. Nothing simpler. The perceptions on which other arts are based frequently remain unemployed by their owner for days, nights, months, or years, without his art’s perishing; whereas, if those of the sponger were to miss their daily exercise, not merely his art would perish, but he with it.

There remains the ‘useful purpose in human life’; it would take a madman to question that here. I find nothing that serves a more useful purpose in human life than eating and drinking; without them you cannot live.

Tychiades That is true.

Simon Moreover, sponging is not to be classed with beauty and strength, and so called a quality instead of an art?

Tychiades No.

Simon And, in the sphere of art, it does not denote the negative condition, of unskilfulness. ‘That never brings its owner prosperity. Take an instance: if a man who did not understand navigation took charge of a ship in a stormy sea, would he be safe?

Tychiades Not he.

Simon Why, now? Because he wants the art which would enable him to save his life?

Tychiades Exactly.

Simon It follows that, if sponging was the negative of art, the sponger would not save his life by its means?

Tychiades Yes.

Simon A man is saved by art, not by the absence of it?

Tychiades Quite so.

Simon So sponging is an art?

Tychiades Apparently.

Simon Let me add that I have often known even good navigators and skilful drivers come to grief, resulting with the latter in

Tychiades That seems to be the upshot. But now proceed tog give us a good definition of your art.

Simon Well thought of. And I fancy this will about do: Sponging is the art of eating and drinking, and of the talk by which these may be secured; its end is Pleasure.

Tychiades A very good definition, I think. But I warn you that your end will bring you into conflict with some of the philosophers.

Simon Ah well, if sponging agrees with Happiness about the end, we may be content.