The Double Indictment (1-5)

ZEUS Plague take all philosophers who say that bliss is to be found only among the gods! If they but knew all that we endure for the sake of men, they would not envy us our nectar and ambrosia, putting their trust in Homer, a blind man and a fraud, who called us blissful and told about what is in heaven when he could not even see what is on earth. Here is an example right at hand: Helius puts his team to his chariot and traverses the sky all day long, clad in a garment of fire and resplendent with rays, not even getting leisure enough to scratch his ear, as they say : for if he unconsciously relaxes the least bit, his horses run away, turn out of the road, and burn everything up. Selene, too, goes about without a wink of sleep, giving light to night-roisterers and people returning late from dinners. Apollo, again, has taken up a very active profession, and has been deafened almost completely by people besetting him with requests for prophecies. One moment he has to be in Delphi; the next, he runs to Colophon; from there he crosses to Xanthus, and again at full speed

And yet the others are not so badly off in comparison with myself. I am the monarch and father of all: but how many discomforts I put up with and how many bothers I have, distracted as I am by such a number of things to think of! First, I must oversee the work of all the other gods who help me in any way in administering my sovereignty, in order that they may not be remiss in it. Then I myself have to do any number of tasks that are almost impossible to carry out on account of their minuteness; for it is not to be supposed that I

So I should like to ask the philosophers, who say that only the gods are happy, when they suppose we really find leisure for our nectar and our ambrosia in the midst of our countless bothers. Now, here is a case in point: for lack of spare time we are keeping all these stale lawsuits filed away, already spoiled by mildew and spiders’ webs, especially those brought against certain persons by the sciences and the arts—some of these are very antiquated.[*] People are making an outcry on all sides and losing patience and hurling reproaches at Justice.and blaming me for my slowness, not knowing that the hearings have not been postponed, as it happens, on account of our negligence, but on account of the bliss in which they imagine we exist : for that is what they call our press of business.

HERMES I myself hear a great many complaints of that sort on earth, Zeus, but I did not venture to mention them to you. Now, however, I shall do so, as you began the discussion of this topic. They are indeed out of patience and indignant, father, and although they do not venture to talk openly, they put their heads together and grumble, finding fault with the delay. These men should have known long ago how things stood with them and should have acquiesced in the verdict in each case.

ZEUS Well, what do you think, Hermes? Shall we open a session.of court for them, or do you wish we should announce it for next year ?

ZEUS Do so. Fly down and proclaim that there will be a session of court under the following regulations. All who have entered suit are to come to the Areopagus to-day; at that place Justice is to empanel juries for them out of the entire body of Athenians, the number of jurymen to depend upon the penalty involved ; and if anyone thinks that his hearing has been unjust, he is to be allowed to appeal to me and have the case tried afresh, just as if it had not been tried at all. (Zo Justice) Daughter, take your place beside the Dread Goddesses,[*] empanel the juries and have an eye on the trials.

JUSTICE Back to earth once more, to be driven off by them and to flee from the world again because I cannot stand being laughed at by Injustice ?

ZEUS You must be of good hope. Certainly by now the philosophers have persuaded them to regard you more highly than Injustice; especially the son of Sophroniscus,[*] who praised just dealing to the skies and declared it the greatest of blessings.

JUSTICE Truly the very man you mention profited greatly by his talk about me! He was handed over to the Eleven, thrown into prison, and drank hemlock, poor fellow, before he had even paid that cock to