The Dead Come to Life, or the Fisherman (41-42)

FRANKNESS

Nothing hard about that. Oyez! Silence! All who assert that they are philosophers, and all who think that they have any connection with the name, come tothe Acropolis for a distribution of gifts! Two minas will be given to every man, and a seed-cake also; and whoever displays a Jong beard shall receive a basket of figs into the bargain. Never mind temperance or justice or self-control, as these qualities are not essential if they are not available; but let each bring with him five syllogisms by all means, for without these it is impossible to be wise.

Lo, we have set up as prize two talents of gold for the contest;

These shall we give unto him who prevails over all in debating!

Cf. Iliad18, 507-8.

PHILOSOPHY

Aha! What a lot of them! The road up to the gate is full of men hustling after the two minas, as soon as they heard of them; others are coming up beside the Pelasgicon;[*] others by the precinct of Asclepius;[*] even more of them along the Areopagus;[*] some, too, by the tomb of Talus;[*] and some have set ladders against the temple of the Twin Brethren[*] and are climbing up with a hum, by Heaven, and “in clusters” like swarming bees, to use the words of Homer;[*] from that side right many, and from the other

Thousands of men, like the leaves and the flowers that come in the springtime.

Iliad2, 468. The Acropolis is full in a trice as they

noisily settle in place,

Iliad2, 463. and everywhere are begging-bags and flattery, beards and shamelessness, staves and gluttony, syllogisms and avarice. The few that came up in answer to the first summons are obscure and inconspicuous, intermingled with the crowd of others, and they escape the eye in the general similarity of garb.

FRANKNESS

In fact, that is the worst feature of it all, Philosophy, and the one for which you could be most criticized, that you have set no mark and token upon them. These cheats are often more convincing than the genuine philosophers.

PHILOSOPHY

That shall be seen to presently; but let us welcome them now.