Zeus Rants (24-26)

POSEIDON For my part I am pretty much subaqueous, as you know, and live by myself in the depths, doing my best to rescue sailors, speed vessels on their course and calm the winds. Nevertheless I am interested in matters here too, and I say that this Damis should be put out of the way before he enters the dispute, either with a thunderbolt or by some other means, for fear that he may get the better of it in the argument ; for you say, Zeus, that he is a plausible fellow. At the same time we'll show them how we punish people who say such things against us.

ZEUS Are you joking, Poseidon, or have you completely forgotten that nothing of the sort is in our power, but the Fates decide by their spinning that one man is to die by a thunderbolt, another by the sword and another by fever or consumption? If it lay in my power, do you suppose I would have let the temple-robbers get away from Olympia the other day unscathed by my thunderbolt, when they had shorn off two of my curls weighing six pounds apiece? Or would you yourself at Geraestus have allowed the fisherman from Oreus to filch your trident? Besides,

POSEIDON Why, I supposed I had thought of a short cut to victory ?

ZEUS Avast ! a stockfish idea, Poseidon, downright stupid, to make away with your adversary in advance so that he may die undefeated, leaving the question still in dispute and unsettled !

POSEIDON Well, then, the rest of you think of something else that is better, since you relegate my ideas to the stockfish in that fashion.

APOLLO If we young fellows without beards were permitted by law to take the floor, perhaps I might have made some contribution to the debate.

MOMUS In the first place, Apollo, the debate is on such great issues that the right to speak does not go by age but is open to all alike ; for it would be delicious if when we were in direst danger we quibbled about our rights under the law. Secondly, according to law _ you are already fully entitled to the floor, for you came of age long ago and are registered in the list of the Twelve Gods and almost were a member of the council in the days of Cronus. So don’t play the boy with us: say what you think boldly, and

APOLLO But it is not for you to give such permission, Momus; it is for Zeus, and if he lets me perhaps I may say something not without sweetness and light and worthy of my study on Helicon.

ZEUS Speak, my boy: I give you permission.