Clouds (825b-868b)

You swore now by Jupiter.

I did.

Seest thou, then, how good a thing is learning? There is no Jupiter, O Phidippides!

Who then?

Vortex reigns, having expelled Jupiter.

Bah! Why do you talk foolishly?

Be assured that it is so.

Who says this?

Socrates the Melian, and Chaerephon, who knows the footmarks of fleas.

Have you arrived at such a pitch of frenzy that you believe madmen?

Speak words of good omen, and say nothing bad of clever men

and wise; of whom, through frugality, none ever shaved or anointed himself, or went to a bath to wash himself; while you squander my property in bathing, as if I were already dead. But go as quickly as possible and learn instead of me.

What good could any one learn from them?

What, really? Whatever wisdom there is among men. And you will know yourself, how ignorant and stupid you are. But wait for me here a short time.

Ah me! What shall I do, my father being crazed? Shall I bring him into court and convict him of lunacy, or shall I give information of his madness to the coffin-makers?

Come, let me see; what do you consider this to be? Tell me.

Alectryon.

Right. And what this?

Alectryon.

Both the same? You are very ridiculous. Do not do so, then, for the future; but call this ἀλεκτρύαινα, and this one ἀλέκτωρ.

Ἀλεκτρύαινα! Did you learn these clever things by going in just now to the Titans?

And many others too; but whatever I learned on each occasion I used to forget immediately, through length of years.

Is it for this reason, pray, that you have also lost your cloak?

I have not lost it; but have studied it away.

What have you made of your slippers, you foolish man?

I have expended them, like Pericles, for needful purposes.

Come, move, let us go. And then if you obey your father, go wrong if you like. I also know that I formerly obeyed you, a lisping child of six years old, and bought you a go-cart at the Diasia, with the first obolus I received from the Heliaea.

You will assuredly some time at length be grieved at this.

It is well done of you that you obeyed. Come hither, come hither O Socrates! Come forth, for I bring to you this son of mine, having persuaded him against his will.

For he is still childish, and not used to the baskets here.