Dramatis Personae STRATOPHANES, a Captain in the Babylonian service. STRABAX, a-young man from the country. DINARCHUS, a young Athenian. STRATILAX, the Churl, the servant of Strabax. CALLICLES, an aged Athenian. GETA, servant of Dinarchus. CYAMUS, servant of Phronesium. PHRONESIUM, a Courtesan. ASTAPHIUM, her servant. SYRA, the female hair-dresser of Phronesium. A MAID-SERVANT of Callicles. PITHECIUM, Mutes, female-servants of Phronesium. ARCHYLIS (Scene.— Athens ; before the houses of PHRONESIUM and of the father of STRABAX) THE SUBJECT.
 PHRONESIUM, a Courtesan, has three admirers—Dinarchus, a dissipated young Athenian; Strabax, a young man from the country; and Stratophanes, an officer in the Babylonian army. To impose upon the last, she palms off a child upon him, pretending that it is hers, and that he is the father of it. In the first part of the Play, Dinarchus returns from abroad, and is admitted by the servant Astaphium into the house of Phronesium. After this, Astaphium goes to the house where Strabax lives, to invite him to visit Phronesium, but is roughly repulsed by Stratilax, his servant. Dinarchus quits the house of Phronesium, not having been allowed to see her, on the excuse that she is at the bath. Phronesium at length comes out, and, in their conversation, tells Dinarchus that she is pretending to have been pregnant by the Captain Stratophanes, and has procured a child to pass off as his. She also begs Dinarchus to make her a present, which he promises to do, and then takes his leave. She then gets everything in readiness to look as though she had just lain in. The Captain arrives from abroad, and produces his presents; but as ready money does not form a part of them, Phronesium expresses extreme dissatisfaction and contempt. At this moment Geta, the servant of Dinarchus, come’s with his present, in money and provisions. A quarrel ensues between the Captain and Geta, who at last takes to his heels, on which Phronesium goes into her house. Strabax then arrives from the country with some ready money, and is admitted to visit Phronesium. Stratilax comes to look for him, and after some parley falls a prey to the allurements of Astaphium. Dinarchus then arrives, but, despite of his recent generosity, suffers a repulse. Before he quits the stage, Callicles, an old gentleman, comes with two female-servants, whom he examines as to what they have done with a female child that his daughter has been recently delivered of. They confess that they have carried it to Phronesium to be passed off as her own, and that Dinarchus is really the father of it. Dinarchus, in great alarm, overhears this conversation, and then accosts Callicles, and, confessing his fault, offers to marry his daughter forthwith. His offer is accepted; on which he revisits Phronesium, to request her to restore to him the child. She, however, prevails upon him to lend it to her for a few days, that she may fully carry out her design of imposing upon the Captain. After this, Stratophanes appears again, and brings fresh presents. He then has a quarrel with Strabax, and the Play ends by Phronesium promising to divide her favours between them both. The text of this Play is in a most corrupt state. THE ACROSTIC ARGUMENT. [Supposed to have been written by Priscian the Grammarian.] THREE ( Tres ) young men are desperately in love for the same woman—one from the country ( Rure ), another from the city, the third from abroad; and that ( Utque ) she may touch the Captain for a heavy haul, she secretly ( Clam ) passes off as her own a child that has been born by stealth. A servant uses great violence ( Vi ) and churlish manners, that Courtesans ( Lupae ) may not squander the savings of his master; and ( Et ) yet he is softened. The Captain arrives, and for the sake of the child ( Nati ) gives costly presents. At length ( Tandem ), the father of her that has been debauched comes to know all, and agrees that ( Utque ) he shall marry her who has seduced her; and he asks back his own ( Suum ) child that has been passed off by the Courtesan as hers. THE PROLOGUE. PROLOGUS A VERY small portion of room does Plautus ask from out of your vast and pleasant city within the walls, whither, without builders, he may transport Athens . What then? Will you give it or not? They nod assent. I fancied, indeed, that I should obtain it of you without hesitation. What if I were to ask something of your private means? They shake their heads. Only see, i’ faith, how the ancient habit still indwells among you, to keep your tongues ever ready for a denial. But let’s to the point, on account of which I came hither. Let this be Athens , just as this is our stage, only for the while that we perform this Play. Here (pointing to her house) dwells a female whose name is Phronesium; she has in herself the manners of the present age; she never asks of her lover that which has been given; but what is left, she does her best that it mayn’t be left, by begging for it and carrying it off, as is the habit of the women; for all of them do this when they discover that they are loved. She is pretending to a Captain that she has been brought to bed, that the more speedily she may sweep away his property from him every atom. Why say more? If the life of this woman should only last, he will be sweeping off his substance with his very life into her hands. (Enter DINARCHUS.) DINARCHUS (to himself) Not a whole life is sufficient for a lover thoroughly to learn, until he has become full well aware of this, in how many modes he may come to ruin; nor does Venus herself, in whose hands lie the sum and substance of lovers, ever instruct us in that art of reckoning—