You propose a good regulation. You ought to have your way, who only ask what’s fair.SAGARINUS Mind it then; if you offend, I’ll forthwith take the forfeit on the spot.STICHUS You ask what’s quite right and just.SAGARINUS(pledging STICHUS.)Here’s to you first of all.Part of line 728 in the Latin.STICHUS ’Tis a droll thing this, for two persons, rivals of each other, to be courting, to be drinking from one goblet, and to be kissing one wench. ’Tis worthy of remark this: I am you, you are I; of one accord are we. With one mistress are we both in love; when she’s with me, still she’s with you; and when she’s with you, she’s with me as well; neither of us envies the other.SAGARINUS Come, come, there’s enough of it; I don’t want it overdone to weariness. I’d now like some other sport.STICHUS Drink on, if you are drinking.SAGARINUS There shall be no skulking in me. But, troth, I’ve had enough of the feast; would but our mistress come here. If she were here, nothing else would be away.STICHUS Should you like us to invite our mistress out? She shall give us a dance.SAGARINUS I agree. STICHUS(calling aloud.)My sweet one, my lovely one, my pleasing one, Stephanium, do come out of doors to your sweethearts; to me you are quite charming.SAGARINUS But to me, indeed, most charming.STICHUS Make us jovial fellows more jovial by your assistance and your company.Returning from abroad, we want you, dear little Stephanium, my honey, that is, if our lovingness is pleasing to you, if we are acceptable to you.

(Enter STEPHANIUM, from the house of PAMPHILUS.)STEPHANIUM I’ll indulge you, my dears; but, so may pretty Venus favour me, I should have already come out of doors here together with you, had I not been sprucing myself up for you. For such is the way of woman, when she is well washed, made clean, dressed and tricked out, still is she incomplete; and a female who is a courtesan much more quickly acquires dislike for herself by sluttishness than always keeps in favour through neatness.STICHUS That’s very cleverly said. SAGARINUS ’Tis the genuine language of Venus.STICHUS Sagarinus. SAGARINUS What’s the matter?STICHUS I’m in pain all over. SAGARINUS All over? So much the more unfortunate you.STEPHANIUM Where do I take my place?SAGARINUS Wherever you please. STEPHANIUM I’d like with both of you, for I love you both.STICHUS Whack go my savingsWhack go my savings: It would appear at first sight, that he has some compunctions, and intends to say, this feast will prove so expensive that all my savings (peculium) will be wasted, and I shall never be able to buy my freedom. There can be little doubt, however, that an, indelicate pun is intended to be concealed under the expression, vapulat peculium.. I’m done for;freedom has abandoned this person of mine.STEPHANIUM Prithee, do give me room, where I may take my place, if, indeed, I am agreable. (She takes her place.)