After I had fulfilled all my task just as I intended, the enemy put to flight, I was leaving them reclining and drinking, each lover with his mistress, and my own mistress there as well, indulging heart and soul. But after I had risen, they begged me to dance. After this fashion (he dances) did I show myself off there quite charmingly, in a master-like style, to wit; for I am thoroughly acquainted with the Ionian step. Thus, clad in my little mantle, full of fun, I was stepping about, this way. Some of them clapped me, others cried out for me to dance again. In that same Ionian fashion once again did I begin to take a turn; I presented myself to my mistress, that she might caress me; as I was pirouetting, down I tumbled: that was the funeral dirge The funeral dirge : The word Naenia, or nenia, has several meanings, among others, that of a funeral dirge, which is probably its meaning here. Pseudolus intends to say that his fall, so far as he was concerned, put an and to his enjoying the amusement of dancing any further. for my sport. And so, while I was a-struggling to get up, near—, almost, I mean, I soiled my mantle. Then, by my troth, I was the cause of plenteous mirth. A goblet was presented me on account of my fall. Forthwith I changed my mantle, and put on this; thence have I come hither, that I might get rid of my surfeit. Now I’m going to my old master, to put him in mind of our bargain. Open-open the door. Hallo, there! Tell Simo, somebody, that I’m here. (Knocks at the door of SIMO’S house.) (Enter SIMO All the former editions introduced Ballio in this scene, and put in his mouth much of what really belongs to Simo. The astute Ritschel saw the absurdity of this, and has rectified the text accordingly. , from his house.) SIMO The voice of a rascally fellow is calling me out of doors. (He stares at PSEUDOLUS.) But what’s this? How’s this? What is it I see in this guise? PSEUDOLUS (staggering towards him.) Your own Pseudolus, drunk, with a chaplet on With a chaplet on : Pseudolus lays some stress on this, as slaves were not permitted to wear chaplets. He, however, presumes on the fact of Simo being in his debt. . SIMO (to himself.) By my troth, this is free and easy indeed. But see his attitude; is he on my account a bit the more afraid? I’m thinking whether I shall address him harshly or kindly. But this (pointing to a purse in his hand) that I’m carrying forbids me to use rough measures towards him just now; if there’s any hope for me, centred in this. PSEUDOLUS (staggering up to SIMO.) A worthless fellow is coming to meet the best of men. SIMO May the Gods bless you, Pseudolus. (PSEUDOLUS eructates.) Foh! go to utter perdition. (Pushes him away.) PSEUDOLUS But why should I have that mischance befal me? SIMO Why, the plague, in your drunkenness, are you eructating in my face? PSEUDOLUS Hold me up, steadily; take care that I don’t fall. Don’t you see me, how drenched and soaking I am? SIMO What impudence is this, for you to be going about this way in broad daylight, drunk, with a chaplet on? PSEUDOLUS Such is my pleasure. (Eructates again.) SIMO Why your pleasure? Do you persist in eructating in my very face? PSEUDOLUS An eructation is comforting to me; do indulge me in it; do but stand off. SIMO For my part I really do believe, you villain, that you are able in a single hour to drink up four right plentiful vintages of the Massic hills The Massic hills : The Massic hills were situate in the Falernian district, in the territory of Naples. The Massic or Falernian wine held the second rank among the choice wines of the Romans. It was considered fit for drinking when ten years old, and might be used up to the twentieth year, but when kept anger was considered to be injurious to the nervous system. . PSEUDOLUS A winter hour A winter hour : The Romans divided the light part of the day. into twelve hours; consequently, the hours of the winter days were much shorter than the summer ones. , add. SIMO You don’t remind me amiss. But tell me, however, whence I am to say that you are bringing your deeply-laden bark? PSEUDOLUS I’ve just been having a thorough bout with your son. That damsel is the cause of this; along with your son she is carousing, a free woman. SIMO You are a most worthless fellow. PSEUDOLUS But, Simo, wasn’t Ballio nicely diddled? How well I carried what I told you into effect. SIMO I know everything in its order, just as you managed each particular. PSEUDOLUS Why, then, do you hesitate to pay me the money? SIMO You ask what’s just, I confess; take it. (Gives him the money.) PSEUDOLUS But you declared that you wouldn’t give it me; and still do you give it. SIMO Are you laughing at me? What? Are you going to take this from your master, Pseudolus?