Are you going to stop this instant, you dirty parasite? PHANISCUS(turning round.)How am I a parasite?ANOTHER SERVANT of CallidamatesWhy, I’ll tell you: you can be drawn anywhere by victuals. Do you give yourself airs, because your master’s so fond of you?PHANISCUS(rubbing his eyes.)O dear, my eyes do acheMy eyes do ache: Phaniscus probably means to say, that the sight of him is as annoying to his eyes as smoke can be..ANOTHER SERVANT of CallidamatesWhy so? PHANISCUSBecause the smoke’s so troublesome.ANOTHER SERVANT of CallidamatesHold your tongue, will you, you clever workman, who are in the habit of coining money out of leadMoney out of lead: According to Erasmus, (Adagia Chil. v. Cent. 1,) this was a proverbial expression among the Romans, signifying the ability to put on a specious appearance..PHANISCUSYou cannot compel me to be abusive to you. My master knows me.ANOTHER SERVANT of CallidamatesWhy, really, his own pillowHis own pillow: There is an indelicate allusion in this line; and another turn has been given to it in the Translation. he ought to know, for resting on when drunk. PHANISCUSIf you were sober, you wouldn’t be abusive.ANOTHER SERVANT of CallidamatesAm I to give heed to you, when you won’t to me.PHANISCUSBut, you rascal, you come along with me to fetch him.ANOTHER SERVANT of CallidamatesTroth now, Phaniscus, prithee, do leave offPart of line 897 in the Latin. talking about these matters.PHANISCUSI’ll do so, and knock at the door. (Knocks at the door of the house of THEUROPIDES.) Hallo there! is there any person here to protect this door from a most serious injury? (Knocking again.) Is any one, is any one, I say, coming out here and going to open it? Why, really, no one comes out here. Just as befits such worthless fellows, so they are. But on that account, I’ve the more need to be cautious that no one may come out and use me ill.(They stand aside.)

(Enter TRANIO and THEUROPIDES, from the house of SIMO.)TRANIOWhat’s your opinion of this bargain?THEUROPIDESI am quite delighted.TRANIODoes it seem to you to have been bought too dear?THEUROPIDESI’ faith, I’m sure that I never anywhere saw a house thrown away, this one only excepted.TRANIODoes it please you, then?THEUROPIDESDoes it please me, do you ask me? Why yes, upon my faith, it really does please me very much.TRANIOWhat a fine set of rooms for the women! What a porch!THEUROPIDESExceedingly fine. For my part, I don’t think that there is any Porch larger than this in the public buildings.TRANIOWhy, I myself and Philolaches have taken the measure sure of all the porches in the public buildings.THEUROPIDESWell, what then?TRANIOThis is far larger than all of them.THEUROPIDESImmortal Gods—a splendid bargain! On my word, if he were now to offer six great talents of silver, ready money, for it, I would never take it.TRANIOUpon my faith, if you were inclined to take it, I would never let you.THEUROPIDESMy money has been well invested upon this purchase.