A sore mischance is provided for this old fellow by the evening; for he must both dine and go to bed in-doors in sorry fashion. SIMO (continuing.) The more I reflect upon it in my mind: if any person has a dowried wife, sleep has no charms for him. I detest going to take a nap. It’s a settled matter with me to be off to the Forum from here, rather than nap it at home. And, i’ faith (to the AUDIENCE) , I don’t know how your wives are in their behaviour; this wife of mine, I know right well how badly she treats me, and that she will prove more annoying to me hereafter than she has been. TRANIO (apart.) If your escape, old gentleman, turns out amiss, there’ll be no reason for you to be accusing any one of the Gods; by very good right, you may justly lay the blame upon yourself. It’s time now for me to accost this old fellow. ’Tis down upon him Down upon him : Hoc habet. Literally, he has it; a term used by the Spectators, when a gladiator received a wound at the gladiatorial games. . I’ve hit upon a plan whereby to cajole the old fellow, by means of which to drive grief By means of which to drive grief : He plays upon the resemblance of the words dolo and dolorem. away from me. I’ll accost him. (Accosting him.) May the Gods, Simo, send on you many blessings! (Takes him by the hand.) SIMO Save you, Tranio! TRANIO How fare you? SIMO Not amiss. What are you about? TRANIO Holding by the hand a very worthy man. SIMO You act in a friendly way, in speaking well of me. TRANIO It certainly is your due. SIMO But, i’ faith, in you I don’t hold a good servant by the hand. THEUROPIDES (calling from a distance, where he is not perceived by SIMO.) Hark you! you whip-knave, come back to me. TRANIO (turning round.) I’ll be there just now. SIMO Well now, how soon—? TRANIO What is it? SIMO The usual goings-on. TRANIO Tell me then, these usual goings-on, what are they? SIMO The way that you yourselves proceed. But, Tranio, to say the truth, according as men are, it so befits you to humour them; reflecting, at the same time, how short life is. TRANIO What of all this? Dear me, at last, after some difficulty, I perceive that you are talking about these goings-on of ours. SIMO I’ faith, you people are living a merry life, just as befits you: on wine, good cheer, nice dainty fish, you enjoy life. TRANIO Why yes, so it was in time past, indeed; but now these things have come to an end all at once. SIMO How so? TRANIO So utterly, Simo, are we all undone! SIMO Won’t you hold your tongue? Everything has gone on prosperously with you hitherto.