O Theuropides, my master, welcome; I’m glad that you’ve arrived in safety. Haveyou been well all along? THEUROPIDES All along, as you see. TRANIO That’s very good. THEUROPIDES What about yourselves? Are you all mad? TRANIO Why so? THEUROPIDES For this reason; because you are walking about outside; not a born person is keeping watch in the house, either to open or to give an answer. With kicking with my feet I’ve almost broken in the pannels? TRANIO How now? Have you been touching this house? THEUROPIDES Why shouldn’t I touch it? Why, with kicking it, I tell you, I’ve almost broken down the door. TRANIO What, you touched it? THEUROPIDES I touched it, I tell you, and knocked at it. TRANIO Out upon you! THEUROPIDES Why so? TRANIO By heavens! ’twas ill done. THEUROPIDES What is the matter? TRANIO It cannot be expressed, how shocking and dreadful a mischief you’ve been guilty of. THEUROPIDES How so? TRANIO Take to flight, I beseech you, and get away from the house. Fly in this direction, fly closer to me. (He runs to wards TRANIO.) What, did you touch the door? THEUROPIDES How could I knock, if I didn’t touch it? TRANIO By all that’s holy, you’ve been the death— THEUROPIDES Of what person? TRANIO Of all your family. THEUROPIDES May the Gods and Goddesses confound you with that omen. TRANIO I’m afraid that you can’t make satisfaction for yourself and them. THEUROPIDES For what reason, or what new affair is this that you thus suddenly bring me news of? TRANIO And (whispering) hark you, prithee, do bid those people to move away from here. (Pointing to the ATTENDANTS of THEUROPIDES.) THEUROPIDES (to the ATTENDANTS.) Move away from here. TRANIO Don’t you touch the house. Touch you the ground Touch you the ground : The ancients were in the habit of reverentially touching the earth, when engaged in any affairs that related to the dead or the infernal Deities. as well. (Exeunt the ATTENDANTS.) THEUROPIDES I’ faith, prithee, do speak out now. TRANIO Because it is now seven months that not a person has set foot within this house, and since we once for all left it.