Because I please you, you select me for an example. THEUROPIDES Say now: what kind of a person did I leave my son, when I went away from here? TRANIO One with feet and hands, with fingers, ears, eyes, and lips. THEUROPIDES I asked you something else than that. TRANIO For that reason I now answer you something else. But look, I see Callidamates, the friend of your son, coming this way. Deal with me in his presence, if you want anything (Enter CALLIDAMATES, at a distance.) CALLIDAMATES (to himself.) When I had buried all drowsiness Buried all drowsiness : Generally we hear of a person being buried in sleep; but Callidamates considers that a drunkard, when he awakes from his sleep, buries slumber. It is not unlike the words of Shakspeare, in Macbeth: Macbeth doth murder sleep! , and slept off the debauch, Philolaches told me that his father had arrived here from abroad; in what a way too his servant had imposed upon the man on his arrival; he said that he was afraid to come into his presence. Now of our company I am deputed sole ambassador, to obtain peace from his father. And look, most opportunely here he is. (Accosting THEUROPIDES.) I wish you health, Theuropides, and am glad that you’ve got back safe from abroad. You must dine here with us to-day. Do so. THEUROPIDES Callidamates, may the Gods bless you. For your dinner I offer you my thanks. CALLIDAMATES Will you come then? TRANIO (To THEUROPIDES.) Do promise him; I’ll go for you, if you don’t like. THEUROPIDES Whip-scoundrel, laughing at me still? TRANIO What, because I say that I’ll go to dinner for you? THEUROPIDES But you shan’t go. I’ll have you carried to the cross, as you deserve. TRANIO Come, let this pass, and say that I shall go to the dinner. Why are you silent? CALLIDAMATES (to TRANIO.) But why, you greatest of simpletons, have you taken refuge at the altar? TRANIO He frightened me on his arrival. (To THEUROPIDES.) Say now, what I have done amiss. Look, now there’s an umpire for us both; come, discuss the matter. THEUROPIDES I say that you have corrupted my son. TRANIO Only listen. I confess that he has done amiss; that he has given freedom to his mistress; that in your absence he has borrowed money at interest; that, I admit, is squandered away. Has he done anything different to what sons of the noblest families do? THEUROPIDES Upon my faith, I must be on my guard with you; you are too clever a pleader. CALLIDAMATES Just let me be umpire in this matter. (TO TRANIO.) Get up; I’ll seat myself there. THEUROPIDES By all means: take the management of this dispute to yourself. (Pushes him to one side of the altar.) TRANIO Why, this is surely a trick. Make me, then, not to be in a fright, and yourself to be in a fright in my stead. THEUROPIDES I consider now everything of trifling consequence, compared with the way in which he has fooled me. TRANIO I’ faith, ’twas cleverly done, and I rejoice that it was done. Those who have white heads ought at that age to be wiser. THEUROPIDES What am I now to do if my friend Demipho or Philonides—