My bones ache with sitting, my eyes with watching, while waiting for the Doctor, till he returned from his business. At last the troublesome fellow has with difficulty got away from his patients. He says that he has set a broken leg for AesculapiusFor Aesculapius: Apollo and Aesculapius were the two guardian Divinities of the medical art. The old man, perhaps, mentions their names instead of those of some persons of whose wonderful cures the Doctor has been bragging., and an arm for Apollo. I’m now thinking whether I’m to say that I’m bringing a doctor or a carpenterOr a carpenter: He says that, talking of mending legs, the Doctor may, for aught he knows, be some carpenter, who has been patching up the legs of statues.. But, see, here he comes.—Do get on with your ant’s pace.

(Enter a DOCTOR.)DOCTOR. What did you say was his disorder? Tell me, respected sir. Is he harassed by spritesHarassed by sprites: Larvatus aut cerritus. The larvati were mad persons, supposed to be afflicted with ghosts or spectres; while the cerriti were persons who were thought to be visited with madness by the Goddess Ceres., or is he frenzied? Let me know. Is it lethargy, or is it dropsy, that possesses him?OLD MAN Why, I’m bringing you for that reason, that you may tell me that, and make him convalescent.DOCTOR. That indeed is a very easy matter. Why, I shall heal innumerable times as manyInnumerable times as many: The Doctor is bragging of his extersive practice. in the day.OLD MAN I wish him to be treated with great attention.DOCTOR. That he shall be healed, I promise that on my word; so with great attention will I treat him for you.OLD MAN Why, see! here’s the man himself.DOCTOR.Part of line 898 in Latin. Let’s watch what matter he’s about.(They stand aside.)

(Enter MENAECHMUS of Epidamnus.)MENAECHMUS of Epidamnus.(to himself.) By my faith, this day has certainly fallen out perverse and adverse for me, since the Parasite, who has filled me full of disgrace and terror, has made that all known, which I supposed I was doing secretly; my own Ulysses My own Ulysses: He complains that the Parasite, who used to be his adviser, and as good as a Ulysses to him, his king, or patron, has been the cause of all his mishaps., who has brought so great evil on his king—a fellow that, by my troth, if I only live, I’ll soon finish his lifeFinish his life: Vita evolvam sua. Literally, I will wind him off of his life. He probably alludes to the Parcae, the Fates or Destinies, who were fabled to be the daughters of Nox and Erebus, and of whom, one, named Clotho, held the distaff, and spun the thread of life; another, named Lachesis, wound it off; and the third, called Atropos, cut it off when of the requisite length.. But I’m a fool, who call that his, which is my own. With my own victuals and at my own expense has he been supported; of existence will I deprive the fellow. But the Courtesan has done this in a way worthy of her, just as the harlot’s habit is: because I ask for the mantle, that it may be returned again to my wife, she declares that she has given it me. O dear! By my faith, I do live a wretched man.OLD MAN(apart.) Do you hear what he says ?DOCTOR.(apart.) He declares that he is wretched.OLD MAN(apart.) I wish you to accost him.DOCTOR.(going up to him.) Save you, Menaechmus. Prithee, why do you bare your arm? Don’t you know how much mischief you are now doing to that disease of yours?MENAECHMUS of Epidamnus. Why don’t you go hang yourself?OLD MAN What think you now? DOCTOR. What shouldn’t I think? This case can’t be treated with even ointment of hellebore. But what have you to say, Menaechmus?MENAECHMUS of Epidamnus. What do you want? DOCTOR. Tell me this that I ask of you; do you drink white wine or dark-coloured?MENAECHMUS of Epidamnus. What need have you to enquire?DOCTOR.MENAECHMUS of Epidamnus. Why don’t you go to utter perdition ?OLD MAN Troth, he’s now beginning to be attacked with the fit.MENAECHMUS of Epidamnus. Why don’t you ask whether I’m wont to eat dark bread, or purple, or yellow? Or whether I’m wont to eat birds with scales, or fish with wings?OLD MAN Dear, dear!(To the DOCTOR.) Don’t you hear how deliriously he talks? Why do you delay to give him something by way of a potion, before his raving overtakes him?DOCTOR. Stop a little; I’ll question him on some other matters as well.