My spleen is killing me, my reins are in torment, my lungs are being torn asunder, my liver is being tortured, my heart-strings are giving way, all my intestines are in pain. PALINURUS The liver complaint is afflicting you, then.CAPPADOX My spleen is expanded. PALINURUS Take walking exerciseTake walking exercise: There is little doubt that he means seriously to tell Cappadox that exercise is the best cure for disease of the spleen. The Procurer, however, thinks that he is laughing at him.; that’s the best thing for the spleen.CAPPADOX ’Tis an easy matter to laugh at the afflicted.PALINURUS Well, then, do you hold outDo you hold out: This passage has much perplexed Commentators. If a period is placed after tibi, and exputescant is read for exputescunt, much of the difficulty is removed. None of the Commentators seem to have observed that, in all probability, si id feceris, if you do that, refers to the advice previously given as to taking exercise. If so, the meaning is clear. If you don’t take exercise, in a few days your inside will be putrefying. If, however, you do so now, while the humours of the body are not corrupted, your inside will fetch a higher price than your whole carcase put together—alluding to the worthless character of the Procurer. for some days until your intestines become putrid. Now, while the humours are pretty sound, if you do that, you yourself might sell for a worse price than those intestines of yours.CAPPADOX Prithee, have done with this, and answer me this which I ask; can you possibly form a conjecture on it, if I relate to you what I dreamt last night in my sleep?PALINURUS Psha, this—(pointing to himself)—this is the sole person that is really skilled in divination; why, the interpreters of dreams ask advice of myself; the answer that I have given them, by that opinion they all stand.

(Enter a COOK, from the house of PHAEDROUMS.)COOK Palinurus, why do you delay? Why are not the things served out for me which are needed for the breakfast to be prepared for the Parasite when he comes.PALINURUS Wait, please, until I interpret his dream. (Pointing to CAPPADOX.) COOK Why, you your own self, if you’ve had any dream, always apply to me. PALINURUS I confess it.COOK Be off, then, and serve out the things.PALINURUS(to CAPPADOX.) Come now, do you in the meantime relate your dream to him. I give you a substitute better than I am myself; for what I do know, all of it I know from him.(Pointing to the COOK.)CAPPADOX Let him give his attention then.PALINURUS He’ll give it. CAPPADOX He does what few do, in being attentive to their masters even. (To the COOK.) Do you give me your attention then.(PALINURUS goes into the house of PHAEDROMUS.)COOK Although I don’t know you, I’ll give it you.CAPPADOX Last night I seemed in my sleep to behold Aesculapius, seated at a distance far away from me; and it seemed that he didn’t come near me, or set any value upon me.COOK The other Gods will do the same, you must know; in fact, among themselves they agree with perfect unanimity. It isn’t to be wondered at, if it fares no better with you. But it had been better for you to pass the night in Jove’s Temple, who has given you his assistanceGiven you his assistance: — He may either mean that Jupiter has favoured him when he has been guilty of perjury, or that the Procurer must be greatly indebted to that God for having so often lent him his name on his making solemn adjurations to further his base purposes. in your oaths. CAPPADOX If, indeed, those should wish to sleep there who have been guilty of perjury, it were not possible for room to be found them in the CapitolIn the Capitol: Though the Scene is in the Peloponnesus, Plautus makes mention of the Capitol, a part of Rome. Some others of the Italian towns had their Capitols in later times..COOK Give your attention to this; ask peace of Aesculapius, lest perchance some great mishap befall you, which has been portended to you in your rest.CAPPADOX You do well in advising me; I’ll go and pray to him. (Goes into the Temple.) COOK And ill speed you with it (Goes into the house of PHAEDROMUS.)PALINURUS(Enter PALINURUS, from the house.)(looking in the distance, as he enters.)O immortal Gods, whom do I behold? Who’s that yonder?(Pointing.)Isn’t that the Parasite, who was sent to Caria? (Goes to the door.) Hallo, come out, Phaedromus, come out, come out, come out this instant, I say.(from the house.)PHAEDROMUS Why are you making this noise here? PALINURUSI see your Parasite running; see, there he is (pointing), down at the end of the streetThe end of the street: This passage, combined with the long soliloquy of the Parasite while still walking along, gives an apt illustration of the great width and depth of the Roman stage.. Let’s listen from here what he’s about.