I was going to dissuade him, mother. ARTEMONA(to ARGYRIPPUS.)A pretty son! (To DEMAENETUS.) Is it proper for a father to teach these morals to his children? Are you ashamed of nothing?DEMAENETUSI’ faith, if there’s nothing else, I’m ashamed of you, wife.ARTEMONAWith your hoary head, your wife is dragging you, you cuckoo, from dens of infamy.DEMAENETUSThe dinner’s cooking; mayn’t I stop, only to take my dinner?ARTEMONAFaith, you’ll dine to-day on a heavy mishap, as you deserve.DEMAENETUS(rising.)I shall repose but uncomfortably; my wife is taking me home condemned.ARGYRIPPUSI told you, father, not to devise ill against my mother.PHILENIUM(to DEMAENETUS.)Do remember about the mantleAbout the mantle: This she says by way of farewell banter to the old fellow, whom she is too happy to get rid of., there’s a dear.DEMAENETUS(calls out to CLEAERETA.)Won’t you order her to go away from here?ARTEMONA(to DEMAENETUS.)Be off home.PHILENIUM(to DEMAENETUS.)Do give me a kiss, at least, before you go.DEMAENETUS(to PHILENIUM.)Go hang yourself.(Exeunt.)PHILENIUMNo, I’ll go in, in preference. (To ARGYRIPPUS.) Follow me this way, my life.ARGYRIPPUSYes, I follow. The COMEDIANSIf this old fellow, unknown to his wife, has been in any way indulging his own inclinations, he has been doing nothing new or wonderful, or otherwise than others are in the habit of doing. No one is there of a disposition so severe, or of a temper so firm, but that he will enjoy himself when he has any opportunity. Now if you wish to interpose in behalf of this old man, so that he be not punished, we think that it can be brought about if you give us loud applause.