MYRTIUM Then you’re not getting married, Pamphilus? PAMPHILUS Are you out of your mind, Myrtium, or is it a
hang-over? Though I must say we remained quite
sober last night. MYRTIUM It was Doris here who gave me this nasty shock.
I sent her out to buy some wool for the little
stranger, and to pray to Artemis to deliver me safely,
and she’d met Lesbia, she told me, and—but it’d be
better for you yourself, Doris, to tell him what you
heard, unless you made all this up. DORIS Ruin take me, mistress, if I told a single lie.
When I got to the town-hall, I met Lesbia who was
all smiles and told me that our lover, Pamphilus,
was marrying Philo’s daughter. She said that if
I didn’t believe her, I was to peep into your alley and
see the garlands everywhere, the girl-pipers, the
commotion, and the people singing the wedding hymn. PAMPHILUS Well, Doris, did you take a peep? DORIS I certainly did, and I saw everything, just as she
said. PAMPHILUS I understand how you were misled. It wasn’t all
lies that Lesbia told you, Doris. What you reported
to Myrtium was true. But you were worried
without reason, for the wedding wasn’t in our house,
but now I recall my mother’s words, when I returned
from here yesterday. “My dear Pamphilus”, she
said, “Charmides, that young fellow of the same
age as you, the son of neighbour Aristaenetus, is
getting married at last. He’s showing some sense,
but how long are you going to continue keeping a mistress
?”Listening to her on and off, I dropped off to
sleep. Then I left the house early in the morning, so
that I didn’t see anything of what Doris saw later on.
If you don’t believe me, Doris, go out again and take a
good look, not just at the lane, but at the door to
see which one has the garlands. You’ll find it
belongs to our neighbours’ house. MYRTIUM You’ve saved my life, Pamphilus. I’d have
hanged myself, if anything like that had happened. PAMPHILUS Such a thing could never have happened. I hope
I’ll never be so mad as to forget Myrtium, especially
now that she’s going to have my child.