They say you had all kinds of sport yesterday,
Lycinus, at the house of Aristaenetus, at dinner, and
that several speeches on philosophy were made, out
of which quite a quarrel arose. Unless Charinus was
lying, the affair even ended in wounds and the party
was finally broken up by the shedding of blood. LYCINUS 
Now how did Charinus know that, Philo? He did
not dine with us. PHILO 
He said that Dionicus, the doctor, told “him.
Dionicus, I suppose, was one of the guests. LYCINUS 
Yes, to be sure ; but even he was not there for all
of it, from the very beginning: it was late and the
battle was about half over when he came on the
scene, a little before the wounds. So I am surprised
that he could give a clear account of any of it, as he
did not witness what led up to the quarrel that
ended in bloodshed.

 PHILO 
True, Lycinus; and for that very reason Charinus
told us, if we wanted to hear the truth of it and all
the details, to come to you, saying that Dionicus


 

himself had said that he was not there for all ot it,
but that you knew exactly what had happened and
could actually recite the speeches, being, as you are,
an attentive and not a careless listener to such
discussions. So do hurry and give us this most
delightful entertainment—-for none, I am sure, could
»be more delightful, at least to me, especially as we
‘shall enjoy a peaceful and bloodless entertainment,
without intemperance and out of range of missiles,
whether it was old men or young who misconducted
themselves at dinner, led on by strong drink to do
and say what they should not.

 LYCINUS 
It was rather a silly affair, Philo, and yet you want
me to publish it abroad and tell what happened when
heads were turned with wine, when it all should be
forgotten and the whole business put down'to a god— .
Dionysus, I mean, who scarcely permits anyone to
remain uninitiated in his rites and a stranger to his
revels. Don’t you think it rather bad form to
enquire into such matters minutely? The proper
thing is to leave them behind you in the diningroom when you go away. As you know, there is a
saying from the poets: “I hate to drink with him
that hath a memory.”
 Author unknown : quoted also by Plutarch (Prooemium to
Quaest. Sympos.). See also Index to Corpus Paroemiogr. Gr. 
And Dionicus did not do
right, either, to blab it all to Charinus and besprinkle philosophers with the copious dregs of their
stale cups. As for me—get out with you! I shan’t
tell you anything of the kind ! PHILO 
That is all put on, Lycinus. But you needn’t have
acted that way with me, for I know very well that



 

you are much more eager to talk than I to listen, and
I have an idea that if you had nobody to listen to
you, you would enjoy going up to a pillar or a statue
and pouring it all out in a stream, without a pause.
In fact, if I should wish to go away now, you would
not let me go untold, but would hold me and follow
me and entreat me. And now I am going to take
my turn at putting on. (Turns to‘another friend.) If
you like, let’s go and find out about it from someone
else. (To Lyctnus.) You may keep your story to
yourself! LYCINUS 
Don’t get angry! I will tell you, since you
are so anxious, but don’t you tell a lot of people. PHILO 
If I have not forgotten all I know of you, Lycinus,
you will do that better than I can, and you will
lose no time in telling everybody, so that I shan’t be
needed.

 

But first tell me one thing—was it to
celebrate the wedding of his son Zeno that
Aristaenetus entertained you ? LYCINUS 
No, he was marrying his daughter Cleanthis to
the son of Eucritus the banker, the lad who is
studying philosophy. PHILO 
A very good-looking lad, to be sure; still immature, though, and hardly old enough to be married. LYCINUS 
But he could not find anyone who suited him
better, I suppose. As this boy seemed to be
mannerly and had taken an interest in philosophy,


 

and also as he was the only son of Eucritus, who is
rich, he preferred him to all the rest as a husband
for his daughter. PHILO 
You give a very good reason in saying that Eucritus
is rich. But come, Lycinus, who were the people
at dinner ?