The effect on me was that by living this pleasant and luxurious life I grew handsome again in
body from having my natural food, and my hide
shone with a fresh growth of hair. But my most
worthy masters, when they saw me growing fat
and sleek, although my barley was not consumed,
but remained of the same amount, began to suspect my audacity. So they went out as if going
to the bath, closed the doors, and applied their
eyes to a crack and watched what went on within. Innocent of the fraud, I forthwith advanced
and took my dinner. They first burst out laughing at sight of the incredible meal. Then they
called the other slaves to see me, and there was
a general laugh, so that the master himself heard
it, because it made such an uproar outside, and
asked what the joke was out there.
When he
heard he rose up from his wine, peeped in, and
saw me swallowing a bit of wild-boar. With a
shout of laughter he entered the room.
I was
greatly disturbed at being discovered by the master





 

as a thief and glutton in one, but he laughed
at me for a long time, and began by ordering me
to be led in to his supper-party. There he bade
them set a table for me, and put on it all sorts
of things, such as no other ass could eat-meats,
oysters, soup, fish—some dressed with caviare and
olive-oil, and some sprinkled with mustard. I,
when I saw fortune smiling sweetly on me, and
perceived that this foolery only could save me,
stood at the table and dined, though I had already made a hearty meal. The company shouted with laughter, and somebody said, "This ass
drinks wine, too, if any one will pour some out
for him." So the master ordered it, and I drank
what was offered me.
 
He perceived, as you may suppose, that I was
a remarkable creature, and ordered one of his
stewards to pay my price to the man who had
bought me, and as much again, and he handed
me over to a young freedman of his establishment, bidding him instruct me in whatever would
make me most diverting
him. The young
man found the task easy, for I obeyed instantly
every instruction. First he made me recline on
a couch, leaning on my elbow like a man. Then
he taught me to wrestle with him, and actually to
dance, standing upright on my hind-feet, and to
nod my head or shake it in answer to questions,
and a number of other things-all of which I


 



could have done even without teaching. And
the report spread far and wide that my master
had an ass who drank wine, wrestled, danced—
most surprising of all, nodded and shook his
head appropriately when spoken to, and, when he
was thirsty, summoned the butler by a movement
of his eyes. The spectators wondered at the
thing as a marvel, not knowing that a man was
shut up in the ass, and I made a fat living out
of their ignorance. I learned to amble and carry
my master on my back, galloping with a pace so
gentle that the rider hardly perceived the motion.
My harness was superb. I wore a purple saddlecloth, my bit was inlaid with gold and silver, and
I was hung with bells which made the sweetest
music.
 
As I have said, Menekles, our master, was from
Thessalonika, and had come to this place to
make arrangements for a spectacle he had promised his countrymen of men skilled to fight with
weapons in single combat. The gladiators were
by this time secured, and the party set out. We
started at early morning, and I carried my master
whenever a stretch of road was rough and hard
for the carriages to traverse. When we arrived
in Thessalonika every one was eager for the exhibition and for a sight of me, for my renown
had preceded me from afar, and the report of
my versatility and manlike gifts of dancing and


 


wrestling. My master displayed me to the most
distinguished of his townsmen over their wine,
and made those amazing frolics of mine an accessary of the dinner. But the man in charge of
me made an income of a good many dollars out
of me.
He used to lock me up in a room, and
when people wished to see me and my incredible
performances he would open the door on payment
of a fee. They used to bring in all sorts of eatables, particularly such as were considered revolting to an ass's stomach, but I ate them all, so
that in a few days, by dining with my master and
the townsfolk, I had already grown large and
terribly fat.
 
Finally that day arrived which was to bring
such distinction to my master. They decided to
exhibit me in the theatre, and this was the manner of my appearance. A large couch was prepared, wrought of Indian tortoise-shell fastened
with bolts of gold. I was laid on it, and in this
posture placed on a machine of some sort, transported to the theatre, and deposited in the middle
amid shouts of applause and a universal clapping
of hands. A table was spread for me, and many
dishes were set on it such as human epicures
have for dinner. Slave boys stood in attendance,
handsome cup-bearers who served me with wine
in a golden cup. The man in charge of me, who
was standing behind, bade me eat my dinner,