When we arrived
at Philebos's lodging—for this was my purchaser's name he shouted in a loud voice, just before the door, "Little girls, I have bought you a
slave, a handsome, stout Cappadocian." These
"little girls" were a crowd of abandoned men,
coadjutors of Philebos, and they all applauded in


 



answer to his shout, for they thought he had really made a human purchase. But when they saw
his slave was an ass they jeered Philebos and
burst out laughing.
The next day they got ready for work, as they
expressed it, prepared the goddess, and set her
on my back. Then we marched out of the city
and tramped about the country.
Whenever we
came into a village, I, the bearer of the goddess,
halted, the crowd of flute players blew a frenzied
strain, and the others, tearing off their Oriental
head-dresses, bending their heads and twisting
their necks, would cut their arms with their swords,
and each thrusting his tongue outside his teeth,
would cut that, too, so that in a moment they
would be covered with fresh blood. When I saw
these doings I at first stood trembling lest the
goddess might sometime have need of asses' blood,
too. But after they had mutilated themselves in
this way they collected coppers and small silver
coins from the surrounding spectators. Some one
might add figs and cheese and a jar of wine, or a
bushel of wheat or barley for the ass.
By these
means the company provided for their own maintenance and the service of the goddess whom I
carried. 
Towards evening one day we halted at the
farm of a rich man. The master was at home,
received the goddess in his house with much


 


pleasure, and offered sacrifices to her. I am still
mindful of the terrible danger I was in at that
house, for the proprietor had received as a present from one of his friends a haunch of wild ass.
The cook took possession of it to dress it, but by
his carelessness it was lost, for a crowd of dogs
contrived to steal in where it was. The man was
so terrified at the storm of blows and the torture
he would get for the loss of the haunch that he
determined to hang himself by the neck. But
his wife, who was my heavy curse, said, "Nay,
dearest, don't take your own life or give way to
such despair. Be guided by me and all will go
well. Take these rascals' ass out to a lonely spot,
then kill him, cut off this quarter, the haunch,
bring it here, dress it and serve it to your master,
throwing the rest of the creature down some
precipice. They will think he has run away
somewhere and got lost. You see how fat he is,
and how much better in every way than that wild
one."

The cook praised the woman's idea. A happy
thought, wife," said he. “It is my only way to
escape a flogging, and it shall be done immediately." Thus did the wretch who was to be my
cook plot with his wife, standing in my presence.
 
But when I saw what was going to happen, I
made a strong resolve to save myself from the
knife; so, breaking the halter they led me by, I


 



leaped out and entered at a run the room where
the rascals were seated at table with the proprietor of the farm. Running in thither, I pranced
about and overturned everything, lamp and tables
together. I thought I had invented in this a
clever means of safety, and that the proprietor
would forthwith order me to be locked up where
I could be guarded safely as an unruly ass. But
this piece of cleverness brought me into the extremest danger. They thought I was mad, armed
themselves with plenty of swords and lances and
thick sticks, and got ready to kill me. When I
saw what great peril I was in, I ran past them into
the room where my masters were to sleep, and,
seeing this, they closed the doors carefully from
the outside.
 
As soon as day dawned I received the goddess
on my back again, and set out in company with
the begging priests, and we came to another village, large and populous, where they announced
something even more striking than usual in the
way of hocus-pocus-namely, that the goddess
would not stay in the house of a man, but would
occupy the temple of the most highly honored
local goddess they had. The people received the
foreign goddess very gladly, and lodged her with
their own.
To us they assigned lodgings with a
poor family. When my masters had made a long
stay here they desired to go on to the neighboring

 

city, and asked their goddess back from the
villagers. They entered the sacred precincts
themselves, brought her away, set her on my
back, and drove me off. But, as luck would have
it, the profane wretches had used the occasion of
entering this temple to steal a votive vessel of
gold, which they carried off hidden under the goddess. As soon as the villagers discovered what
had happened they gave chase; when they came
near they leaped down from their horses, arrested
them in the road, accused them of sacrilege and
temple-robbing, and demanded the stolen offering. Searching everywhere they found it in the
lap of the goddess. So they bound the wretches,
led them back, and cast them into prison. The
goddess whom I carried they took and placed in
another temple, and the golden vessel they restored to the local goddess.